My Child Has No Autonomy : 5 Tips

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Preparing your child to become an independent adult is the goal of every parent; we want him to make his own decisions and make responsible choices.

Yet, how many adults are dependent and subject to the decisions of others? How many lose their identity in this addiction and do not know what they want or what they like?

WHY DEVELOP
YOUR CHILD’S AUTONOMY?

Helping a child develop his autonomy is a gift for life, for autonomy develops :

– the feeling of having power over his life;
– self-efficacy;
– a sense of importance and belonging;
– confidence and qualities such as calmness, concentration, self-help, cooperation, self-discipline and self-confidence;
– sociability by allowing him to acquire consciousness in itself and to be sensitive to others.

HOW TO DEVELOP
YOUR CHILD’S AUTONOMY

REVIEW HIS ROUTINE
Just like adults, children can be responsible for specific tasks. Assign small everyday tasks to your child that he can do alone, like making his bed, feeding the animals, brushing his teeth, or getting dressed.

LET HIM DO IT
Try not to do things for him, but without abandoning him. Show him he can do something alone, knowing you are close by.

GIVE HIM SPACE
You fear accidents from overenthusiastic children? Learn to calm yourself and leave space for your child to try his own experiences.

GIVE HIM CHALLENGES
Daily, give your child small challenges to stimulate his desire to take action himself, such as pouring milk or tying his shoes.

ENCOURAGE HIS IDEAS
Do not deny or ridicule his creative ideas, otherwise this will slow his initiatives.

ATTITUDES THAT MAY AFFECT NEGATIVELY

Some attitudes adults have negatively affect the development of autonomy in children. Here are a few :

– tending to be overprotective;
– constantly repeating instructions;
– wanting the child to tell everything;
– constantly supervising activities;
– not letting him do things in his own way;
– fixing conflicts yourself;
– worrying when the child is away from you.

 

References
– Maman pour la vie, 2016. www.mamanpourlavie.com
– Les super parents, 2015. www.les-supers-parents.com
– L’estime de soi des 6-12 ans, par Danielle Laporte et Lise Sévigny, Les éditions de l’Hôpital Sainte-Justine, 2002.
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